


I'm reaching for the heights

by sarahyyy



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Breaking Up & Making Up, Getting Together, M/M, Misunderstandings, yuri is Bad at Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 02:38:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9637244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahyyy/pseuds/sarahyyy
Summary: Holy shit, the Internet is right. Otabekdoesthink that they’re in a relationship.





	

When it happens, when the revelation finally hits Yuri, they’re both in their hotel room, and it’s the night before Worlds. 

“Beka, are we in a relationship?” Yuri asks, stunned to his core.

Otabek doesn’t even bother looking up from his crossword puzzle. “Of course we are,” is his easy answer, like he doesn’t even have to think about the question because he already knows the answer, like he expects _Yuri_ to already know. 

Holy shit, the Internet is right. Otabek _does_ think that they’re in a relationship.

Yuri can’t let Otabek go on being so misinformed — it will ruin their friendship. 

He has to tell Otabek that they can’t be in a relationship.

“We can’t be in a relationship,” Yuri blurts out, because he’s never had a particularly good brain-to-mouth filter in front of Otabek. 

That, at least, has Otabek looking up at him. 

Otabek regards him silently for a moment, and Yuri is expecting a lot of things to go down right now (worst case scenario: Otabek storms out and never speaks to him; best case scenario: Otabek grins and tells Yuri that he’s just messing with him), but all Otabek does is to shrug at him, and say, “Okay.”

Yuri blinks.

Just like that? It feels almost as though it’s too easy, and if there’s one thing Yuri Plisetsky knows, it’s that nothing is ever that easy. 

“I don’t have time for relationships,” Yuri tells Otabek, attempting to get Otabek to understand that Yuri’s problem isn’t with Otabek, but with the whole idea of dating. 

“Okay,” Otabek says again, and Yuri doesn’t really think it’s possible, but he sounds even more casual than the first time. 

Could it really be that easy? Maybe it really is. After all, things have always been easy with Otabek. They click in a way that Yuri can’t really explain. 

“So, we’re just friends now, yeah?” he asks, just to confirm. 

“Just friends,” Otabek echoes, and strangely enough, it sounds like a promise.

Even stranger, the words make Yuri feel as though he’s just been punched in the gut.

—

Yuri packs his stuff back into his bag, and heads to Yakov’s room to ask for his room key, because it feels weird to be sharing a room with Otabek given what just happened. Even if he hadn’t really been dating Otabek, Otabek had obviously thought they were in a relationship, and Yuri should give him some time to adjust, right? 

And okay, maybe Yuri’s still reeling from the weirdness of everything, and a little on edge at Otabek’s earlier nonchalance, but that doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just that Yuri’s never really tried to end a (non-existent) relationship with anyone before. He’s just not used to it, that’s all. 

“What do you mean your room key?” is what Yakov says when Yuri asks for his key. “I didn’t book you a room! I haven’t in years! You always end up staying in Otabek’s room anyway.”

Seriously? Like, sure, he’s close to Otabek, and sure, Otabek thought that they were dating, but is that really any reason not to book him a room? He’s a three-time GPF gold medalist, for fuck’s sake. 

He doesn’t say any of that, but Yakov must read it on his face, because he follows up with, “I’m not sharing my room with you, so you’d better go make nice with Otabek, or sort out the rooming issue with reception on your own.” He pauses. “I’d pick the former, if I were you. They don’t usually have extra rooms when there’s a tournament going on.”

“Ugh,” Yuri groans, and heads to the elevator to make his way downstairs.

—

Yakov was right, the hotel doesn’t have an empty room, and Yuri ends up in Victor’s room, which is even worse than his original idea of sleeping in the lobby (a plan that was only foiled because Yuuri caught sight of him and forcibly dragged Yuri back to his suite with Victor), because Victor and Yuuri keep sending him these awfully sad looks asking if he wants to talk about it, and telling him that they can go get him ice cream if he needs it.

Which just… 

Doesn’t. Make. Sense. 

Because Yuri is fine, there’s nothing to talk about, he just want some quiet so he can go the fuck to sleep. He tells them as much, and they tuck him into bed like he’s a _child_ , and then proceed to tell him that everything is going to work itself out.

Yuri will never admit it to anyone, but it does make him feel a little bit better, even though he’s absolutely _fine_. 

—

It turns out that slipping into sleep and staying asleep are very different things.

The first time Yuri wakes up in the middle of the night, it’s because it’s too cold, and his first conscious thought goes straight to _‘Where the fuck is Otabek?’_ because Otabek’s body temperature runs hot, and Yuri never gets cold when Otabek is also in bed with him.

The thought keeps him up for longer than he’d like to admit.

The second time happens just a little after dawn. Yuri must’ve forgotten about drawing the curtains shut, because it’s too bright for his liking, and he’s only ever able to remain asleep when it’s completely dark in the hotel room. 

Otabek always remembers to draw the curtains, and Yuri can’t remember when the last time he had to do it on his own was. 

Without Otabek in bed with him, the bed also feels oddly too large. There is too much space, Yuri can move around too much, and he's not used to falling asleep like this.

He misses Otabek.

—

At breakfast the next day, Otabek sits next to Yuri as usual, but he doesn’t make a move to peel the shell of Yuri’s hard-boiled eggs for Yuri like he normally does. 

Yuri suffers through painstakingly peeling his own goddamn eggs, doing a terrible job, and taking way too much time to do so. Through this terrible ordeal, Otabek is just sitting right next to him, eating his oatmeal, and not talking to Yuri much.

Yuri’s chest constricts tightly, but he soldiers on, and peels his goddamn eggs.

Breakfast goes by horribly, for reasons that most probably have nothing to do with the eggs, but he blames them anyway.

—

Just before Yuri’s free skate, Otabek wishes him a good luck, but all it does is to make Yuri feel miserable. 

He can’t help but to contrast the _davai_ Otabek just yelled from a distance to the _davai_ he’s been so used to getting, whispered into his ear, Otabek’s arms warm and comforting around him.

He’s distracted through his through his skate, but not so much that it shows in his scores. Yakov isn’t too pleased with him, but fuck Yakov. Yuri is going to place on the podium anyway, they both know that already.

Yuri has more important things to have mixed feelings about, namely the fact that Otabek isn’t waiting to congratulate him on his skate, isn’t lingering around the kiss and cry area waiting for Yuri like he normally does. 

And okay, given how Otabek has been acting the entire morning, Yuri hadn’t been expecting the hug he usually gets after his skates, but he thought that at the very least, Otabek would _be here_ for Yuri, but he scans through the crowd looking for Otabek’s stupid face, and it’s the worst feeling in the world when he doesn’t find Otabek.

He gets, instead, Yuuri and Victor coming to him, twin worried looks on their faces, and to his horror, Yuri can feel tears gathering in his eyes.

Victor’s eyes widen. “It’s not so bad!” he cries. “It’s not your best skate, but you still did very well, Yurio!” 

“Shut up,” Yuri grits out.

“I swear,” Victor continues, _not shutting up_ , “it’s a decent skate. You’ll still place-”

Yuuri silences him with a look. 

“Oh,” Victor says, looking back at Yuri, and then squeezes Yuri’s forearm briefly before he leaves him with Yuuri.

Yuri expects Yuuri to say something, to bestow him with some sagely advice on how to handle relationships, but all Yuuri does is to draw him into a hug, still quiet, still completely respectful of Yuri’s need for absolute silence.

It is at this moment, in Yuuri’s arms, that he is suddenly struck with another epiphany. 

“I fucked it up with Otabek,” he lets out in a rush, because oh God, he did, didn’t he? “I didn’t mean to, but I fucked it up anyway, because I had no idea that I was _in love with him_.”

Yuuri hums, and squeezes Yuri tight. “Well, now you know, so what are you going to do to fix things?”

Yuri pulls away from the embrace. “Fix things?” he echoes.

Yuuri’s smile is encouraging, and his eyes twinkle with soft amusement. “You _are_ going to fix things, aren’t you?” he asks. 

Yuri nods, and then keeps nodding, because the Katsudon is right, and there’s no reason why he can’t fix things with Otabek. 

He’s always been honest and direct with Otabek, and there’s no reason why he has to stop now. All he has to do is to talk to Otabek, to tell Otabek that _he loves him_ , and—

“What if I can’t fix it?” 

Yuri will never admit, not even at gunpoint, to how vulnerable he comes out sounding when he asks Yuuri that question, but Yuuri, because he’s Katsuki ‘Too Good for This World and by Definition Definitely Too Good for Victor Nikiforov’ Yuuri, doesn’t mock Yuri for it, just shrugs and says, “Then you come back to me, and we’ll come up with better strategies to fix things over some katsudon, okay?” 

—

“Good job on the free skate, Beka,” Yuri says, falling into step with Otabek as he heads for the lockers. 

There’s only Phichit left to go, and with the current standings, Otabek is guaranteed to be on the podium, at least. 

“Thanks, Yuri,” Otabek says quietly.

“Yu _ra_ ,” Yuri corrects, perhaps a little too aggressively, because Otabek is startled into halting mid-step.

He turns towards Yuri. “I’m sorry if I’ve been…distant,” he tells Yuri, eyes downcast. “It’s not the easiest thing to do, going back to being just friends,” he confesses. 

“Well,” Yuri says, “then _don’t_.” He clears his throat. _Honest and direct_ , Yuri reminds himself. “Being just friends sucks,” he says, and that has Otabek looking back up at him. “Can you go back to being my boyfriend or whatever again?” 

For a long moment Otabek doesn’t say anything, and Yuri feels his chest start to constrict. 

What if Otabek has changed his mind about Yuri? Holy shit, what if in the one day they’ve been apart, Otabek has found _someone else_?

He’s thinking his way into a heart attack when Otabek breaks into a smile. 

“I don’t know, Yura,” Otabek says. “ _Can_ I?” 

Yuri rolls his eyes, but he can’t help but the smile that creeps up, his whole body loosening in relief. “Will you?” he asks, not because he doesn’t know the answer by now — it’s clear from the fondness in Otabek’s eyes, the soft curl of his lips. 

Yuri just really wants to hear Otabek say it. 

“I’ll think about it,” Otabek tells him, and then resumes walking while Yuri lets out a squawk of indignation. “I’ll tell you over dinner. Your treat.”

**Author's Note:**

> Yuri 300% chases Otabek into the locker room after this, and they 30000% do the Smooch.
> 
> As usual, I'm [here on Tumblr](http://sarah-yyy.tumblr.com/) if you want to drop by, say hi, and cry about otayuri with me (PLEASE).

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[podfic] I'm Reaching for the Heights](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15325770) by [The_Storybooker](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Storybooker/pseuds/The_Storybooker)




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